November 6, 2007

Lots Of Thinking & Many Questions

First off, before I even get around to all the thinking I've been doing, I want to thank Wendy at Playing Hooky for giving me a Wonder Woman Award. I'm so grateful to Wendy for thinking of me, and the award came just when I was in need of a pat on the back, or a hug, or a kind word--you get the picture--and it miraculously, virtually, provided all three. Thanks Wendy! I'll be passing the award on later this week to another deserving blogger.

Every time I try to put my thoughts of the last few days into words I stumble. I've had so many questions and new ideas flying around my head lately I hardly know where to begin. My ideas have really been challenged--mainly by a discussion on the unschooling basics discussion group at Yahoo! (It's the one titled "newbie needing encouragement re: tv.") But also thanks to JJ and Nance (and now Tammy) in the comments section of my post called Unschoolers on Video Games.

Here are some of the questions I've been asking myself, along with the answers I've come up with:

1.) What if I accepted my son's love of video games, and all his interests as valid? Wouldn't that be a wonderful gift?

Yes!

2.) By creating the video game compromise is Jerry missing out on the opportunity to make his own choices?

Obviously, the answer is yes. Which begs the question:

3.) How do we create an environment where all family members interests and feelings are valued?

I'm still working on the answer to that one but this question is leading me closer to an answer:

4.) Is my goal for Jerry to stop playing video games to suit me and his father? Or is my goal for Jerry to stop playing video games because he has found something else just as compelling?

No, and yes. I don't want him to stop playing because of us. If he chooses not to play video games I'd like for it to be because he's doing something else that he loves just as much. Which leads me to the question:

5.) What exactly are my goals for Jerry? Do they have anything to do with video games?

Actually, they don't. I want Jerry to be curious and happy. I want him to have a sense of wonder about the world around him. I want him to love spending time with me and his dad. Video games (or the lack of them) don't really appear anywhere in my goals. So:

6.) Why am I so fixated on video games?

I haven't figured this one out yet either. Mainly I think it's fear. Also, I feel like when he's playing video games he's kind of in his own world. I feel excluded. Which leads me to:

7.) If I want to be a part of his world why don't I just join him?

Duh! Why didn't I think of this before?! Actually, I did think of it before because many people have suggested it. I'm just kind of dense. I have dabbled in his world of video and computer games--he made an account for me on Adventure Quest (which I've never used), but I've never really taken the plunge. Sounds like I'd better get my suit on!

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