Spitball Warfare

When we were at the Maker Faire I bought some awesome books. So far, our favorite is Mini-Weapons of Mass Destruction: Build Implements of Spitball Warfare by John Austin. After the cops and helicopter left the other night, Jerry and I ventured out into the front yard and he made a catapult out of clothes pins, rubber bands, a plastic spoon, binder clips, and tape.

Charlie watched from the sidelines. (So did Warren, but I didn't take a picture of him.)

Here's the finished product.

And here is the opposing army (as you can see, they have no weapons–we took them by surprise).

And, just for the heck of it, here's Jerry peering through a roll of duct tape.

The other books we bought are also really cool. They are The Way Toys Work by Ed and Woody Sobey and Stomp Rockets, Catapults, and Kaleidoscopes: 30+ Amazing Science Projects You Can Build for Less Than $1.

I forgot to mention in my post yesterday that I have a new laptop! I had been waiting for Warren to get another job before I bought a new one. My previous computer was really old (in computer years) and was almost completely out of space. Actually, it did run out of space while I was working on my group project, which was what inspired me to make a trip to the Apple Store to upgrade. We got a free printer and iPod Touch in the deal. So, Jerry was ecstatic and so was I. And now that I have space on my computer I can put photographs on my blog again! Yippee!

In other (sadder) news, our dog, Patsy, has Cushings Disease, which isn't deadly but is deadly expensive to treat. I found a natural remedy for it online, though, so we're going to try that out first. She also has a urinary tract infection, poor thing. And is now taking two different meds for arthritis. Needless to say, I'll be on the look out for discount veterinary pharmacies online–just as soon as I recover from the shock of paying for this first round of medications.

Sorry, I'm even boring myself here. I was just about to tell you about the minor surgery Jerry will be having on his big toe very soon but, lucky for you, new computers still have delete buttons. I won't bore you (or gross you out) with the details, except to say that we love his podiatrist because, not only is he a fabulous doctor and a nice guy, he's also an XBox gamer.

And now, finally, I will say something about unschooling. I know. You forgot this was as an unschooling blog, didn't you? Well, I've been reading the most wonderful, unschooler-friendly book called The Mathemetician's Lament by Paul Lockhart. You can read the first half of the book online here, but I highly suggest you buy the book so you can underline key passages and share it with family members who worry that your children will not be able to function in the world without taking a math class. The book is informative, funny, scathing, and explains the beauty of mathematics (something I've never quite understood until now). I love some of the things Lockhart writes about teaching:

"Teaching is not about information. It's about having an honest, intellectual relationship with your students. It requires no method, no tools, and no training. Just the ability to be real. And if you can't be real, then you have no right to inflict yourself upon innocent children."

"Teaching means openness and honesty, an ability to share excitement, and a love of learning. Without these, all the education degrees in the world won't help you, and with them, they are completely unnecessary."

I won't quote anymore of it here, since you can read it online. But please do read it! You won't regret it.

Well, I could go on to tell you about my tennis elbow, but I think you've had enough excitement for one post. I'll just leave you with one final quote from The Mathematician's Lament. He's writing about trigonometry as it's taught in school:

"Two weeks of content are stretched to semester length by masturbatory definitional runarounds. Truly interesting and beautiful phenomena, such as the way the sides of a triangle depend on its angles,will be given the same emphasis as irrelevant abbreviations and obsolete notational conventions, in order to prevent students from forming any clear idea as to what the subject is about."

Sad, but true.

Now I am off to study!

Lost Comments & A YA Reading List

All my comments are lost. That's sad new for any new unschoolers who are looking for advice, because in the early years of this blog most of the helpful advice could be found in the comments section. My role as the New Unschooler/Blogger was to freak out and make all kinds of mistakes and the commenter's role (thanks JJ!) was to talk me down and set me on the right path. I have the comments saved on my computer for now and hopefully will find a way to get them back onto my blog, but for now an important record of my growth as an unschooler is gone.

In other news, I'm helping my friend Terri with a new blog for her business. So I'll be posting here a few (or a couple...or maybe one) times a week. Those posts will be more general parenting-type stuff--no pouring out my soul. That only happens here. :)

Warren has been visiting his mom for the last two days and my house is a disaster. Since he's been off work he's the resident maid (when he's working we don't have one) and now that he's gone I can sure feel the difference. It turns out that the whole "clean as you go" thing actually makes a difference. Who knew?

Jerry got an XBox 360 for Christmas and has been catching up with his friend, Josh, in New Zealand and some local friends that he doesn't see much (or enough) via XBox Live. It's really cool.

I've had a cold (and now a sinus infection) since New Year's and have taken the opportunity to catch up on my young adult reading. I've read A Great and Terrible Beauty, When You Reach Me, Beige, Going Bovine, and An Abundance of Katherines. I think my favorites were Going Bovine, A Great and Terrible Beauty and When You Reach Me. Though, I enjoyed the others as well. In the adult category I read The Elegance of the Hedgehog, which I loved. I guess when I'm feeling sick it's easier (and probably slightly more interesting) to give you a reading list than an actual accounting of what's been happening (lots of nose blowing).

And with that, I'll say good-bye.

Books About Puberty For Boys

In my ongoing search for ways to help Jerry to be more health conscious (yes, I'm still worrying about his activity level!) I got a few books from the library today. I was looking for something that would deal specifically with health but ended up with getting some books on puberty, figuring they'd have information on eating right and exercise as well. I'm going to give you a quick overview of each of the books I looked at. I didn't read them all cover to cover. These are just my general impressions after spending about 15 minutes with each book. I'm saving the best for last so if you want to skip the losers and go right to my favorite, scroll down!

I actually only spent about thirty seconds on the first one, Boom: A Guy's Guide to Growing Up. Right away, I happened upon this passage:

Staying focused on Jesus in all your relationships is top priority. If a friendship or romantic relationship is dragging you away from God, it's time to call it quits.

I immediately checked to see who the publisher was and realized that this book was more about religion than anything else--that's definitely not what I was looking for.

Boy's Guide to Becoming a Teen by Jeremy Daldry makes a lot of assumptions that don't apply to homeschooled kids. First off, it assumes kids are in school and makes constant reference to experiences that only happen in school. Secondly, it assumes kids at this age don't want to talk to or be involved with their parents--that's not exactly what you hear from homeschooled kids and it definitely isn't what I hear from Jerry. Also, and maybe this is the urban parent in me, I didn't like the way the author handled the subject of tattoos and piercings. He was fine with ear piercing, but when it came to tattoos and piercing other parts of the body he resorted to scare tactics like, "Some piercings are very painful and can take a long time to heal" and "Tattoos are very risky and can cause infection." Sure these may be valid points, but for some reason this just smacked of manipulation to me. So that book was out, too.

The Guy Book: An Owner's Manual by Mavis Jukes was exactly what I had hoped to find. Compare the previous book's comments on piercings with this one:

If you are thinking of piercing your penis here are a few things to consider: Piercing equipment needs to be sterile in order to prevent the transfer of germs--including those that cause AIDS and hepatitis. Piercing should only be done by a professional. Body piercings don't always heal completely, and any unhealed wound no matter how small, can provide an entry point for germs.

Now that's real information. I wasn't exactly looking for this particular information, and honestly, I kinda hope Jerry won't be looking for it either (ever!). But, if he does he'll know where to find it--free of judgment and manipulation. The book has real information on lots of other subjects, too, including a chapter on health called "Operating Instructions: Keeping the System Running Smoothly" which includes tips on avoiding "parking violations" (failure to get off the couch). Jukes includes everything a kid could want to know (and a few things they may prefer to ignore!) about operating the human body. And since I've never lived in a boy's body myself, I plan on reading it too!

There you have it. I'm going to return the other books, buy a copy of The Guy Book and slip it into Jerry's bedroom. That way he can read it in peace and quiet when he's ready. I'm going to xerox the health section, though, so we can read it together--I don't want to wait on that part because I want to be sure I'm giving him the information he needs to make conscious choices now, rather than later. It's all stuff I've said before but maybe hearing it from another voice (the author's) will make a difference.

You May Have Noticed...

that I haven't been blogging lately. Sorry. I'm taking a brief hiatus. We were out of town over the holidays, then my parents were visiting, now I'm going to see a friend in San Francisco. (Alone! Woo hoo!!) And my sister and her family are returning from Ireland (For Good! Double woo hoo!!!!!!) on January 19th. And we might go camping in early February. And Warren has been off so we're trying to clean out the office, but really we seem to be making more of a mess. Anyway, there's so much going on I've hardly been at the computer at all except to look up answers to the odd question from Jerry ("I wonder what's the longest a person has gone without taking a shower.") or to research fun things to do (we found an r/c airplane club nearby!) and find a new Japanese tutor for Jerry (the first lesson is today!). So blogging has taken a back seat, as has reading other people's blogs (sorry!). I expect things to settle down in mid-February but I'll try to get a few posts in before then. One piece of exciting news (not as exciting as my sister coming home, though) is that I'm thinking of joining The Compact. My friend Angela is doing it and I've been thinking of joining her but I'm hesitant because we plan on painting the inside of our house and that would mean I'd have to buy new paint. Maybe that's a lame excuse. Anyway, I'm still not buying other new things. Oh, except there's a new game we want to get and we thought we'd order a chemistry set for Jerry. See!? It's hard to get out of the habit of buying stuff! And how do you do it when you're educating your child at home!? Anyway, it's all good stuff to think about and even if we don't go whole hog and stop buying new stuff altogether we'll definitely be more mindful of what we choose to buy--and most of it will be used.

And speaking of buying used--now that Christmas is over I can show you what I made for my mom and my sister! I had so much fun making gifts this year that I think I'll do it every year.
I found a little kids table and chair set at a second hand store and bought it thinking I would give it to my brother and his girlfriend for their baby girl (due in April) but then I remembered that my mom has this cute little tea set and has always talked about having tea parties with Cora, my niece, and now Cora is coming back from Ireland and they'll be living with my parents for a while so my mom will need a little table. So I decided to paint it and give it to my mom.And for my sister I made a purse using an easy tutorial I found online. I used a piece of upholstery fabric I got from my very first job out of college (a fabric store for interior designers) that I've been holding onto for 17 years and I just love the way it turned out. Part of me wished she wouldn't like it so I could take it back and make her a different one!Inside the purse I put a collection of my favorite short stories. I xeroxed them from my own books and wrote an introduction, made a pretty cover, and bound the pages together. It wasn't until after I compiled the stories that I read them all again and realized how depressing most of them were! That's part of the reason I wrote an introduction--I had to warn her that reading the stories all in one sitting might lead to thoughts of suicide. So far she's still with us though, so I don't think they've had a negative impact. The stories I chose were:

• In the Cemetery Where Al Jolson is Buried by Amy Hempel
• Melinda Falling by Jincy Willett
• Cathedral by Raymond Carver
• Memories of Youghal by William Trevor
• Shooting Dad by Sara Vowell (that one's an essay, not a story)

Anyway, I really just wanted to check in and say hello. I hope you all had a happy Christmas and I wish you a wonder-filled new year!!

I'm Famous!

Okay, famous may be a slight exaggeration. But I'm in a book! Well, not me exactly. My blog. This blog. The very blog you are reading now is featured in Tammy Takahashi's new book Deschooling Gently. Isn't that cool!? Tammy had asked if she could put the Graph of My Emotional State While Deschooling (the fact that I bothered to graph it should tell you something--it wasn't pretty) into her book shortly after I'd posted it. I said, "Go for it!" and then kinda forgot about it. 

Until this afternoon I wasn't even sure if my graph had actually made it into the book. Yes, I know I could have sent an e-mail and asked. But that didn't occur to me. Also, if the answer was no I didn't especially want to hear it. It's kinda like that thing you do with your checking account when you're broke. You know how you just try not to look at it? No? Okay, it's the kind of thing I do when I'm broke. Anyway, I ordered the book a few days ago and figured I'd find out when I got it. But it hasn't arrived yet.

However, today was park day and Tammy was there with copies of her book! And the graph is in! And I met Tammy, which was really cool because I knew she lived nearby and was part of our homeschool group (the rockin'est homeschool group ever) but I'd never actually met her before. Pretty cool, eh?

I know I shouldn't really tell you all to buy the book since I haven't read it yet, but it is getting great reviews. Summer over at Mom is Teaching gave it 5 out of 5 stars and said it's "perfect for new homeschooling parents yet still a great read for the more experienced ones who are feeling stuck in a hamster wheel." And a bunch of people at park day today said it's a terrific book to give to concerned family members. And, of course, if you read Tammy's blog you already know she's a joy to read--honest and smart and totally in tune with what's happening in the diverse world of homeschooling. Aw, heck. What am I waiting for? Buy the book! 

How To Avoid An Outburst

I have just finished a bowl of pasta with kalamata olives, feta cheese and tomatoes smothered in Italian dressing. The pasta was really just a vehicle for getting the cheese and olives into my mouth. My mouth is very happy now. I'm also sipping a nearly finished Monteith's Original Ale. That's good too.

It's been two days since Bad Day/Bad Mom and I think I've figured a few things out. First of all pretty much everyone (okay, everyone) that left comments to that last post agreed that it's alright for Mom to lose her cool every now and then; many people commented on the fact that I probably just need some time to myself (Amen!); and all agreed that it's okay to not feel ready for a hug just because your child wants one. I gratefully respond to each and everyone one of you: "Phew! Unschooling doesn't mean I have to be perfect!?"

The day after our Bad Night I remained emotionally removed from everything and everyone. We met Caroline, the wife of Warren's co-worker, and her three-year-old son for lunch--our husbands were miraculously able to break away from work with the rest of the editing crew--so I had to put on a happy face which, no doubt, was a good thing. After lunch we went to a place called Clip 'n' Climb for some indoor rock climbing with Caroline and her adorable, way to young to cause such problems, son. I looked longingly at his innocent little face all day, trying to conjure up the Jerry I used to know. Oh fine, I'm being dramatic. I really like the Jerry I know today. (I liked the three-year-old Jerry, too. Did I ever tell you how he used to tell everyone his name was Batman? Strangers would ask him his name and with a perfectly straight face he'd say "Batman." When said person laughed and said "Oh, how sweet, but what's your real name?" He'd look at them like they were completely daft and say, "Batman, idiot." Actually, he left out the idiot part, but you could tell he was thinking it.)

So, we passed the day as if we were under water (We did have fun at the rock climbing though!) and on the bus ride home finally talked about the previous night. We both agreed that we weren't quite over it yet but it felt better (at last) to talk about it.

Now, back to what I've figured out or, How To Avoid An Outburst (for a while, anyway):
1. Get some alone time. I need it. Enough said.
2. Stop doing all the work around the house on my own. Even though I didn't think it bothered me that I was doingdishescookingdinner-
groceryshoppingwashinglaundrymakingbedssweepingcleaningpayingbills all by myself while Jerry lounged on the couch, I realize now I was, subliminally, very bitter about it. So I'm going to start asking Jerry to pitch in more.
3. Buy some soothing herbal tea (in lieu of heavy drugs). I find tea--especially English Breakfast or Earl Grey--really soothing and I've required four to five cups of soothing a day since we got here. So I bought some Sleepytime tea in hopes that it will knock me out. (I'm already using Rescue Remedy Sleep and it's not working!)
4. Read Eat Pray Love--again. I didn't realize I needed this until I bought it today as a birthday gift for someone. I started rereading it on the bus ride to the party and didn't want to give it up when our ride ended. So I bought another copy for myself. In fact, I think I'll go to bed right now and get reading.

(But first, while we're on the topic of books, I have to say that the recent New York Times article, It's Not You, It's Your Books, has given me a total complex. I've been thinking about what my favorite books say about me and I'm afraid they might say I'm shallow and girlie. First off the only two books I've read twice (and loved both times) are Pride and Prejudice and I Capture the Castle. I also loved Lolita, The Wind-Up Bird Chronicles, Saturday, The Goat (or, Who is Sylvia), loads of short stories, and a bunch of other un-girlie stuff. But I'm thinking the two (soon to be three) books I've read twice don't sound very impressive. That's all. I just wanted to get that off my chest.)

Wanna Know Something Else?

The film business is not family friendly. Maybe you already knew that. Or maybe you didn't. But I'm here to tell you it stinks for families. Yes, the travel is cool. Jerry has seen more of the world than a lot of adults but the trade off is that his dad is never home for dinner, works a lot of weekend, and goes out of town fairly frequently. Can you tell I just tried calling him (iChatting him, actually) and he was too busy to talk to me? He's got to hurry up and make a tape so some producer can let it sit on his coffee table for five hours before he watches it. I'm a little bitter. And even though it's going to be awesome to be in New Zealand it's going to be me and Jerry alone most of the time. Any traveling we do will be without Warren, except a few weekends here and there if he manages to get both days off.

Geez. I'm in a funk, aren't I? I think it's the stress of leaving.

Let's think about happy things:

1.) I bought a new lens for my camera today. That's cool. I'm planning on taking lots of beautiful photos in New Zealand and sharing them with you all on my blog. I may even splurge on a wide angle lens. I need to talk to Warren about it first because it's not cheap. He already said we should get one but I'm not sure if he realizes how expensive they are.

2.) We had another fun day at circus class today. I hung upside down on a trapeze and did a split thing with my legs and arched my back and it was awesome! Of course, I couldn't repeat it. The next time I tried it, well, let's just say it wasn't very graceful.

3.) We spent the afternoon with our homeschool friends at the book store. The kids found books they liked and sat at a table reading while the other mom and I chatted. Her kids showed me lots of their favorite books and I bought a few new ones for Jerry and I. This is what we got:

Dragon Drive 6 (It's a manga series Jerry LOVES.)
The Sea of Trolls by Nancy Farmer (She wrote The House of the Scorpion, which I really liked.)
Holes by Louis Sachar (We've never read it.)
Coraline by Neil Gaiman (Zach, my friends 12yo says it's the "freakiest book ever.")
Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher. (That's for me--even though it's YA.)

4.) I'm going salsa dancing again tomorrow!! Woohoo!

5.) I'm going to see a play on Saturday with friends from waaaaaaay back in the day when Warren and I first met. We met at a Grateful Dead show, by the way. That's how Jerry got his name. He was born a couple months after Jerry Garica died. It's a funny story, the way Warren and I met, which I'll tell you sometime--even though it involves illicit drug use (sorry Mom and Dad--I still turned out fine.).

But, now that I've found my happy place again it's time to get to work on my taxes and editing the newsletter and cleaning my kitchen and making dinner. Ick. When I put it all together like that it sounds so oppressive. Let me rephrase that: Now that I've found my happy place again I'm going to move forward and accomplish the goals I've set for myself so that I can go to bed tonight with a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. As if.

A Birthday Surprise

Jerry says his twelth birthday was his best ever. It was certainly full of surprises! The day before his birthday he received a card, completely out of the blue, from a family we had met at family camp last August. There was a check for $120.00 in it! $120.00!!! We hadn't spoken to this family since camp ended. It was such a wonderful, exciting, out of the blue thing for Jerry to find in the mail box.

He knew exactly what he wanted to buy with it. An electric guitar. So we went over to Guitar Center that same day and he bought a Les Paul junior. Jerry kept it a secret from his dad all day, so that when Warren got home he would be surprised. Boy was he!

When I told friends and family about the check almost everyone's first reaction was "That's weird." Isn't it sad the way we just can't wrap our heads around receiving gifts or sometimes even kind gestures from people we don't know very well? How fabulous for that family, to be in a position to surprise a twelve-year-old boy on his birthday. And how nice for Jerry to be on the receiving end of such kindness. It's not weird. It's wonderful!

There's a hilarious book by Danny Wallace called Join Me that addresses this very topic (among other things). Wallace placed an ad in a freebie newspaper that just said, "join me." He didn't say what joinees we're joining him for, just that they were to send a passport photo to his address if they were interested. The photos started pouring in. Before he knew it Wallace found himself leading a cult, only he had no idea what the cult was meant to do.

After much thought, and a few pints, Wallace created a first assignment for his followers'. It was simple. "Make an old man happy." They were to buy a random old man a cup of tea, pay for his bus fare, that kind of thing, and they did. Many of them even documented these acts with photos. Eventually, Wallace extended these random acts of kindness to everyone, regardless of age or gender, and the Karma Army was born. Wallace's followers would strive to practice one random act of kindness each week. The only stipulation was that it had to be random, unexpected, and kind.

As long as I'm on the subject of Danny Wallace his second book was just as good as "Join Me." It's called Yes Man. In this book Danny has taken the advice of a stranger on a bus who suggested he "say yes more." But instead of saying yes "more" he decides he'll say it all the time--to everything. It's laugh out loud funny but the book really gets you thinking about where a simple "yes" can lead.

I guarantee that if you read both of these books you'll say yes more and leave some surprised strangers feeling grateful, even if they do think you're a complete lunatic.

All Volcanoes All The Time

This is a photo of our Mt Veusvius model - phase one. This project (we're building a model of Mt. Vesuvius and Pompeii, then making Vesuvius erupt) is keeping me sane these days. When I start to worry about the whole deschooling process I comfort myself with the knowledge that J is learning so much about geology and Ancient Rome (with a bit of geography thrown in). We're both having a lot of fun with it.

These are some of the homeschool volcano resources we've discovered:

DVDs:
The DVD that sparked J's interest in volcanoes (Mount Vesuvius, in particular) was the first disc of Secrets of Archaeology.

Roman City is a DVD companion to the book City (listed below) by David Macaulay. J refused to watch the DVD (he didn't even give it a chance!), but I really liked it.

Books About Volcanoes:
Usborne Understanding Geography: Earthquakes and Volcanoes by Fiona Watt

Volcano by DK Publishing

Mount Vesuvius: Europe's Mighty Volcano of Smoke and Ash by Kathy Furgang

Fun Books about Ancient Rome:
Roman Soldier's Handbook: Everything a Beginning Soldier Needs to Know by Lesley Sims

The Roman Record by Paul Dowswell

City: A Story of Roman Planning and Construction by David Macaulay


Web Sites:
Legends of the Volcano

A List of Resources from A to Z Home's Cool

Ancient Pompeii

This is a really cool experiment.

Volcano-Related Field Trips In California:
Lassen Volcanic National Park in Northern California has examples of every type of volcano.
The Getty Villa in Malibu, Callifornia has an exhibit called "The Herculeneum Women and the Origins of Archaeology." Herculeneum was buried in the same 79 A.D. blast that covered Pompeii.



Here's a photo of J at the Getty Villa today. The villa is a recreation of the Villa dei Papiri, a Roman country house built on the slopes of Mt. Vesuvius. Many of the statues throughout the gardens are replicas of those found in Pompeii and Herculeneum.

Good Advice

I'm going to start a collection of good advice for beginning unschoolers. Since I'm a beginner myself most of it will come from other people via comments on this site, conversations I've had, or books I've read. I do have one piece of advice to offer, though, so I'll start with that. It's the one and only thing I know for sure.

From me:

Don't assume that what works for one family will work for your own.

This is an excerpt from a comment on my blog by OrganicSister:

Let me tell you two things that I wish I knew from the get-go:
1st, the whole 1-month-per-yr-of-school thing is a crock! [She's referring to the deschooling process here.] Throw it out the window. My son went to school for two and a half years but it took me AND him about 8 months to deschool. Yours might be less or it might be more but it will rest mostly on your shoulders, so be prepared. ;-)
2nd, there is unschooling and there is radical unschooling. Unschooling gives freedom in education over to the child while radical unschooling applies the principle to their whole life. You can unschool without RUing but it tends to lead to RUing eventually. Just take it one day at a time and reevaluate every so often if you're both happy or need changes.

From the woman who runs the ISP we've just joined:

Unschooling doesn't mean unparenting. You're still the parent!

An excerpt from a comment on my blog by Tracy:

First, he's learning something from all of it. [She's referring to his daily activities.] In time you'll learn to embrace just "living it" and won't feel the need to pick apart all that is educational from every moment. Second, a good distraction...is just diving right into your own projects and interests. Next time check out stuff from the library for yourself. If he's interested, that's great! But don't think in terms of trying to sneak in educational stuff for his benefit.

More from Tracy:

One thing you might find helpful... my son is a computer nut, too. I find that whenever I start worrying about how much time he is spending (and yes, it occasionally happens even when you've been doing this for years) I just go to him and ask him to show me what he's doing. He loves to show me the games he is playing. He loves to make me play (I'm horrible!) and tell me, step by step, how to get things done...It's an interesting process. And honestly, my time is pretty limited because I tend to have a short fuse for some of these games...It's enough to keep my mind boggled by all the stuff he has picked up and to be awed by his direction-giving skills (he's 6). And it quells my anxiety when it rises. But mostly, it's a way to spend time with him doing something that gives him pleasure.

An excerpt from a comment by Tammy:

Keeping true to your family and to yourselves is more important than any label. You recognize relationships come first, and part of that is to be a parent. That's what kids expect of us. Yet you don't take your role for granted and you let your kids be their own people. Finding that balance - that's the key. And like you said, it's going to look different for every family.

From "The Relaxed Home School" page 52, by Mary Hood, Ph.D.

As long as you provide a variety of materials and experiences, and children are free to make their own choices, they will automatically select those items that will work best for them. When parents have accepted the value of allowing children to learn on their own in this manner, they sometimes go overboard and purposefully avoid instigating learning experiences themselves. There's never any harm in offering to help a youngster read a story, or asking them if they'd like to play a particular phonics game! The harm comes from forcing these activities when the children aren't interested. Often when this happens it's because the children are not yet ready for a particular experience. If you try something and it doesn't seem to be working, you can always back down and try something a little different later. That's one of the benefits of home schooling.

(By the way, Mary Hood will be speaking in the Los Angeles area on Novemver 2nd and 3rd. Click here for more information.)

I'll keep adding to this post as the advice rolls in or as I read and learn more. Let's hope it fills up fast!